Are You Trying or Doing?

We’ve done a bit of a movie marathon in the Kelly house lately. Cold days coupled with a few sick kiddos made it a good use of our time.

With the new Star Wars coming out, I thought it helpful to walk the boys through a few of the great ones, just to prime the pump, so to speak. “The Last Hope”, “Empire Strikes Back”, and “Return of the Jedi” got us ready. (No, we didn’t watch the ‘first three.’)

For those who don’t know, Yoda, the Jedi Master and teacher extraordinaire, features prominently in the latter two as he prepares and guides Luke Skywalker towards his confrontations with Darth Vader and the evil Emperor.

Luke trains. He listens. He sweats. And, like any student, he whines, pouts a bit, and questions.

When tasked with something seemingly insurmountable, Luke sullenly replies, “Ok, I’ll try.” Yoda, not waiting a bit, jumps on this waffling with:

“No. Do, or do not. There is no ‘try.’”

Ok, I’ll Try….

Why do we use the word ‘try?’ I think it has a lot to do with setting ourselves or others to

be ‘ok’ with our failure. We are putting our toes half into the water, risking a little rather than a lot. Rather than diving in a getting after whatever it is in front of us, we waffle.

I’ll try to climb the wall.

I’ll try to be nice to her.

I’ll try that new food.

All of these are said in a way that is half in, half out. When you put yourself into such a situation, you go at ‘it’ with half a heart, half a mind – and normally get half the result.

Wax On, Wax Off

If you’ve not seen the classic ‘Karate Kid,” you should. (The new version is good, too, but I’m partial to the older version.)

It’s a true underdog, ‘hero’s journey’ story. Teenager Daniel moves to a new state and new school, wants to fit in, and gets bullied. Daniel then stumbles onto a wise teacher who helps him gain both the tools necessary to defend himself and the wisdom to know when to use those tools. Daniel is challenged and comes out the other side victorious… and different.

In the middle of the dark period, our young hero is trying to make a deal on something big. “Maybe I can do just this much and that will be ok,” Daniel is saying. His teacher, Mr. Myagi replies:

“Daniel-san, walk on one side of the road, ok. Walk on other side of the road, ok. Walk down middle… SQWEECH! Crushed like grape.”

Let’s Do

When we decide to do something, we aren’t always successful. We can put every ounce of effort into the task, do all of our homework, have a great attitude and… we do not succeed. That’s just life. And, you know what? That’s totally ok!

At Weequahic, we’ve adopted a saying that fits: ‘Either we win or we learn.’

The key is to really get after it – whatever that is. To DO. When you approach tasks this way – leaving nothing in the tank – you not only give yourself the best chance of success, you avoid the mean big brother of “I’ll Try”: “What if…”

You want to have a lot of friends? Then be a friend. You want to climb the wall? We’ll support you all the way up (and down!). All you have to do is commit. Trying a new food? Act like you are going to love it.

And, should things not go the way you wanted, then you’ve learned. Keep learning! It’s the only way to get from where you are to where you want to be.

Go on. Give it your all. To borrow Yoda’s voice, ‘happy for it, you will be.’ Have a great week!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.