Category: Campfire Conversation

we are all neighbors

What is Your Chartres?

January 3rd, 2025

Earlier last year, I got to spend some time visiting camp families in Paris. We’ve been fortunate to have a long line of French campers and look forward to more. With each successive trip, I’ve taken some time to explore the area around Paris more. (The European rail system really is wonderful.)

This past year, I got to spend a day at Chartres Cathedral.

Most of you have probably heard of Notre Dame in Paris. It’s an incredible piece of gothic (and more) architecture and one of the most beautiful churches in the world. But, over and over again I’ve heard or read, ‘You have to see Chartres.’

So, all by myself, I hopped a train and made the 1.5 hour trek to Chartres on cold, Sunday morning in February. I’m so happy I did.

The cathedral is stunning. The spires on the front are a marvel. It looks like something out of the most incredible graphic novel you’ve ever seen – the detail, the size and scope… even the floor is designed beautifully with a traditional labyrinth. The only two human-built places I’ve been more stunning were Old Jerusalem and St. Peters in Rome.

The service was in French which I don’t speak. And, it was a Catholic service… which I’m not. But – wow – incredible.

Aim for Chartres

So… why the travel report on some gothic cathedral you may never see? Good question.

You see, I recently stumbled on a list of principles from a serial (and successful) entrepreneur. One was simply listed as ‘Aim for Chartres.’ Thankfully, there was a link to this interesting idea.
Turns out, this phrase was uttered by a pretty exceptional architect, builder and teacher in order to inspire his students. From Christopher Alexander:

“… I find that the single thing which inhibits young professionals, new students most severely, is their acceptance of standards that are too low…. That standard (Chartres) must be our standard. If you are going to be a builder, no other standard is worthwhile.”

Building Habits

Campers, what is your Chartres? You most likely don’t know yet.

That’s ok – took me a long time, too. BUT… this is important so lean in… focusing on whatever I was really interested in at the time helped me build habits that led to making Weequahic my ‘Chartres.’

Didn’t matter if it was my school work (ok – once I figured out I wouldn’t be a doctor), my golf or my extra-curricular groups like the IMPS at UVA.

Once I got seriously into that which I chose to do, I started building important habits that created more drive, attention to detail, big picture thinking, servant leadership, business understanding and more.

None of those things were, ultimately, my ‘Chartres.’ However, all that practice prepared me to lead and run Weequahic. (All of that also led me to the biggest prize in my life, Kate, and our three young men.)

What Is Your Chartres… Right Now?

Whatever you are working on, do your best. Make it a masterpiece to the best of your ability. Work a little extra on it, ask for help, compare it to something you’ve done before.

Please don’t misunderstand – whatever it is you are doing does not need to be perfect. I know Picasso and Renoir and Jobs and Freda would all want to make changes for a long time on their works. None of them are “perfect.”


Perfect is not the point. The point is what you learn along the way while working towards that vision in your head. It’s about exploring new boundaries within yourself and the world around you. I’ll leave you with this quote from Y Combinator founder, Paul Graham:

“With ambition, you tend to get one step below what you aim for. So, unless you try to be the best, you won’t even be good.” Go do your best. Every time. All the learning will be worth it.

Have a great week!

A Year of Joy

December 27th, 2024

As Kate, Jack, Luke and I put a little winter work in at Weequahic, we’ve found ourselves talking about all the great moments of this past twelve months, especially those related to camp. I thought I’d share a few as we round out 2024 before welcoming in 2025.

Families Uniting

One of the crowning jewels of the year has been three camp weddings/engagements. Our beloved Samson married her true love in October with Nuge walking her down the aisle. There was a huge (and rowdy) contingent of Weequahic staff – past and present – at the party to welcome she and Nathan to married life.

Nic and Ximena – long time staff members who worked as bunk counselors, program leaders, DHs and more – got engaged. (The only hiccup – they planned their wedding the day before campers arrive in ’25. We’ll be at the wedding… in spirit.)

At the end of the calendar, many of the Weequahic team got to celebrate Luis and Mariana’s wedding in Buenos Aires. After sixteen summers at Weequahic as a bachelor, our venerable Waterfront Director will returned a married man… to a wonderful woman he met at Weequahic in 2022. SO GOOD!

Alumni Growing Up & Giving Back

Last summer, we had over 45 former campers back to Weequahic as staff members. They served in a number of roles – bunk counselor and program specialists, Program Heads, Division Heads, members of the Special Events team… and even one doctor!

What is the greatest joy of a camp director? It’s hard to tell as there are so many. However, watching the young girls and boys who get off the bus each summer grow into young women and men who welcome new campers into the community and culture that they love (and helped to build!) is pretty high on the list.

It starts with great families back home who believe in the beauty and importance of a summer community. It grows from campers who truly connect and find their best selves underneath our incredible pines and under the attentive eyes of our summer team. It culminates with these young people deciding to give back to those who follow them at Weequahic.

My favorite quote from last summer? From an alum during at the end of her first summer as a staff member: “Cole, I never knew how hard my counselors worked to make it great for me and my friends. I know I loved being a camper. But this summer? The best. EVER.”

Weequahic Making Memories

More returning campers last summer than ever before. The largest CIT group in Weequahic’s history. A new tradition started for our Senior 10s with their own Boston Trip. New campers arriving from 12 states and 12 different countries. Canteen. The highest number of returning bunk counselors in past 10 years. The Play. The Circus Show. Dancing on the chairs in the Dining Hall. Trips off camp. Campouts in the new Tree House. Did I mention Canteen? Friday Night Campfires. Brook’s first-shot-make in the Gitch. Scoring 100% on our ACA certification review. Cookouts making a triumphant return (with the new ‘dessert pass’ from Kate & Cole). A rainy Bucket Brigade. Singing in the Rec Hall. Swimming in Sly Lake. Laughing with your friends. Doing activities you only get to see on Youtube….

We’ve all got different memories from Summer ’24. Just like anything else, the ones you focus on the most get bigger and have more staying power. You can choose to dwell on the one thing that didn’t go well – that one bad meal or time you missed home for a few minutes or the bunkmate who – from time to time – was challenging.

Or… or you can DECIDE to focus on the so many great things that happened. Because the good, the joyful, the happy moments were LEGION. Pick a few. Focus on them. And come back for more of them in 2025.

Happy Friday, Weequahic. Here’s to even more JOY in 2025.

Really Seeing

November 15th, 2024

Short. Tall. Different hues. Long Hair. Short. Glasses. Braces. Both. Neither.

We all look different. And, depending on your own personal background and experiences, you’ll most likely look at someone and make an initial judgement.

This will depend on a lot of things: what you’ve experienced in the past with someone dressed the same or looking similar or what you’ve been taught or what you believe.

But there are always surprises. For example, I’m typing this on an airplane. A man in the ‘first class’ section of the plane just stood up. He had glasses, a fancy coat and briefcase in his hand. Business man, right? Well… I thought he same until I saw his ‘shoes’ – each toe had its own little sleeve but yet they looked like loafers.

There HAS to be more to this guy than the first glance would tell you. And that goes for all of us.

More About You

When we view someone (or something) else, the idea we create of that person (or thing) tells you more about yourself than about that which you are actually viewing.

We get used to people looking at us. In fact, a lot of time, we dress or act or accessorize ourselves in a way to tell a story. We want to come across as someone is a ‘part of the group’ or someone who wants to disappear.

Some people’s genetics make them a lot taller than most of their fellow humans. Others have genetics that make them much shorter. I passed two people who fit each description on the way to my airline gate and caught myself looking a little too much at both.

They are used to it, I thought. Then I realized this: I don’t know what they are used to. I don’t know a darn-thing about them. I’ve got this idea in my head about who they are or what they feel or thing but that’s just it – an idea. Simply put, I was seeing my idea of them rather than who they actually were.

Tattoo Bob & Wrong Impressions

How often do we do this – make quick assumptions about the person and what think or feel or dream about, what they’d say or do in different situations.

When Kate and I first worked at camp, a huge truck pulled up late one night, shining its (many) lights into the office. I was the only one in there at the time. This HUGE figure stepped out. I’m talking like ‘The Rock’ big. Tattoos up and down his arms and neck, crew cut, enormous boots and ripped jeans. While my protective instincts marshalled, I also knew I was wayyyy out-matched if things went sideways.

“You must be Cole,” this mountain of a man said as he stuck out his hand. “I’m Sgt. Bob, your new security man. Pleased to finally meet you in person.”

Phew. I had a few ideas in my head. To realize none were about to come true was a relief. Tattoo Bob worked with us for many summers and was a great guy! In fact, he even serves as our ‘night nurse’ on more than one occasion as he was also the head of the local EMTs.

Questions for You

Who do you see that you THINK you know a lot about but really don’t know a thing. Here’s an even easier question: do you know the name of the person who serves your food at lunch or cleans the classroom? How much will it change your life if you did?

My mother made sure my brother and I did. Mr. Frank worked at our school driving buses and cleaning the classrooms for years. Mr. Bridges (who we used to call Mr. ‘Britches’) is still working at my old school.

Several years ago, a group of my friends and I bumped into Mr. Frank at the local Waffle House. We had a great time reconnecting… and were shocked that he knew not only our names but asked about our parents, made comments about where we had gone to college and that he was proud that we’d all grown into good young men.

…

It’s hard to describe what meant to us at the time. It definitely changed the complexion of the night. This man, who had served our food at lunch, drove us safely on the bus, and made sure our school was always ready for our learning, really knew us. Even more, he was proud of us.

He said that us 25 years ago and I still remember. Let me tell you… it meant a lot to me.

Get to know the people in the small world around you, kiddos. You’ll be pleasantly surprised at the result. Have a great weekend!