A big portion of our little world recognizes (and celebrates) this weekend. Our Jewish friends observe Passover. Our Christian friends celebrate Easter. Therefore, I thought it to be a good time to think about receiving gifts… though not in the way you may be thinking.

First, let’s start with our fabulous, wonderful brains. (See? Curveball….)

Your Brain

Your incredible brain has three major levels which have developed over time. The oldest is called the ‘brainstem.’ You don’t really think about this one because it runs a lot of your body on its own. This keeps us breathing, our hearts beating and more… even when we sleep. This is the oldest part of our brains.

The ‘limbic system’ is all about feelings and memories. It helps you feel things like happiness, sadness, or excitement. It also helps you remember stuff, like your favorite birthday party or how to ride a bike. It’s like the part that makes you say, “Yay!” when you get ice cream or “Uh-oh” when you’re scared. This part is younger than our brainstem but older than the last part….

The ‘cortex.’ This is the brain’s smart boss, the wrinkly outer part that makes you super clever. It helps you think, solve problems, talk, and make plans, like deciding what game to play or figuring out a math problem. It’s what makes you, YOU—helping with imagination, creativity, and making choices.

So… Why is the Brain Important to this Discussion?

Good question. Here’s the answer: because you have a lot of control over the cortex and very little control over the limbic system. (And, unless you are some very highly trained monk, you won’t have any control over the brainstem.)

When you feel scared – whether in ‘real life’ or in your own head (which, by the way, are the same thing…) – your limbic system starts to react. It remembers things hurting or things threatening and it tells your body to get ready to react to save yourself from that perceived danger.

Your heart rate goes up. You actually get a little stronger. Your reaction time increases. You might feel those ‘little butterflies’ in your stomach.

When you feel safe, things are different. Your body’s ‘safety system’ goes into a receptive mode – you are more relaxed, calm, and able to thoughtfully handle what is coming your way. If you feel safe, you can take on big thing with a clear mind. The limbic system has relaxed… it’s remembering the good stuff and having the cortex help it along.

Receiving a Gift

Now that we know how the brain works (a little) and a bit of difference between the ‘react’ state and ‘receive’ state, let’s talk about gifts.

Can you receive a gift with your hands all balled up and closed or with your arms crossed against your chest? Nope. You’ve either gotten yourself ready to fight (hands balled up) or protect yourself (arms crossed.) You are ready to react.

No, you need your arms out and hands open and ready to receive something. In other words,  you need to feel safe. You’ve got to quiet your ‘safety systems’ and be receptive to what is coming your way.

How do you do that? A couple of ideas as it relates to jumping in beautifully at camp this summer:

1. Imagine things going really well. A smile on your face, hearing a bunch of friendly voices from counselors and campers alike, great weather and a fabulous setting.
2. Make a plan for when things go a little sideways: Who will you ask for help? (Pick me! Or your counselors! Or Camp Mom Judy! Or your DH! The list is long….) What happens when you feel someone isn’t being so friendly? (Be patient and keep smiling.) When you miss home, how will you approach those feelings?
3. Truly understand and believe this: We are excited to get you to camp and sooooo many people will be there who just want to be your friend just as you are. You don’t need to change a thing.
4. Lastly – express your thankfulness to your family for making this happen. Gratitude opens up a lot of good things.

See You Soon!

Ok – that’s enough for today. To recap: your brain will put you either in a reactive or receptive state. Feeling danger/worry makes you reactive which doesn’t always help in the long term. Practice thinking about and prepare for things to go great this summer and be receptive. That’s how you can best receive the gift of camp.

See you soon!