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The Keystone

January 10th, 2025

Weequahic is a proud member of the Pennsylvania Camp Alliance. It’s a great group of camps from all over the state that work to better each other and work closely to educate and advocate for our chosen industry.

You may not know this but Pennsylvania’s motto is ‘The Keystone State.’ It’s an important idea, being a ‘keystone.’ If you don’t know what it means, a ‘keystone’ is a ‘central stone at the summit of an arch, locking the whole together.’

Without a strong and stable ‘keystone’, the arch falls. No more bridge, roof, or other important structure. Builders have to choose a strong stone and place it correctly so that everything holds together and lasts.

Choices

We talk a lot about ‘choices’ at Weequahic.

Yes, our campers get to choose their activities (and do them only with other kids in their same age group). Yes, our kiddos get to choose from between a ton of great food options in our Dining Hall thanks for Chefs Daniel and Isian and the team. Heck, our campers even get to choose if they want a top or bottom bunk before they get to camp.

But there is a whole set of choices that are made each and every day (moment to moment, really) that are so much more important: how you choose to act.

That’s an important idea that our campers are reminded of often at Weequahic. When something challenging happens, you can choose to act courageously or inappropriately or even ignore it completely. (That last one is a choice, too!)

But, without our parents there to watch over and help guide the choices, what happens? Well… we get a lot of learning. More than anything else, we learn about the keystone of all values:

Integrity

Warren Buffet, one of the greatest investors and business owners to ever live, looks for three things in people. Speaking to a graduate class at an Ivy League school, he answered ‘What qualities do you look for in people?’ question this way:

“Intelligence, energy, and integrity. And if they don’t have the last one, don’t even bother with the first two. I tell them, ‘Everyone here has the intelligence and energy—you wouldn’t be here otherwise. But the integrity is up to you. You weren’t born with it, you can’t learn it in school.”

How do you treat people when no one else is looking? How do you treat someone who can do nothing or very little to help you? Do you choose to honor your promises or not?

Bob Marley said,

“The greatness of a (person) is not in how much wealth they acquire, but in (their) integrity and (their) ability to affect those around him positively.”

Not Easy… and Important

Living a life of integrity is not easy… and it’s more fulfilling. The moments I feel the worst are when I know I’ve should have said something or done something but didn’t. I didn’t live with integrity.

Why? Most likely because I was afraid. I didn’t practice one of the cardinal virtues of Weequahic – courage – and, instead, led a smaller life in that moment.


But, we get to choose again and again and again. The more often we choose to live with integrity, the more of a habit it becomes.

Go out there and act with integrity. It’s a keystone habit and one that, while not always easy, is doubly important. Have a great weekend!

we are all neighbors

What is Your Chartres?

January 3rd, 2025

Earlier last year, I got to spend some time visiting camp families in Paris. We’ve been fortunate to have a long line of French campers and look forward to more. With each successive trip, I’ve taken some time to explore the area around Paris more. (The European rail system really is wonderful.)

This past year, I got to spend a day at Chartres Cathedral.

Most of you have probably heard of Notre Dame in Paris. It’s an incredible piece of gothic (and more) architecture and one of the most beautiful churches in the world. But, over and over again I’ve heard or read, ‘You have to see Chartres.’

So, all by myself, I hopped a train and made the 1.5 hour trek to Chartres on cold, Sunday morning in February. I’m so happy I did.

The cathedral is stunning. The spires on the front are a marvel. It looks like something out of the most incredible graphic novel you’ve ever seen – the detail, the size and scope… even the floor is designed beautifully with a traditional labyrinth. The only two human-built places I’ve been more stunning were Old Jerusalem and St. Peters in Rome.

The service was in French which I don’t speak. And, it was a Catholic service… which I’m not. But – wow – incredible.

Aim for Chartres

So… why the travel report on some gothic cathedral you may never see? Good question.

You see, I recently stumbled on a list of principles from a serial (and successful) entrepreneur. One was simply listed as ‘Aim for Chartres.’ Thankfully, there was a link to this interesting idea.
Turns out, this phrase was uttered by a pretty exceptional architect, builder and teacher in order to inspire his students. From Christopher Alexander:

“… I find that the single thing which inhibits young professionals, new students most severely, is their acceptance of standards that are too low…. That standard (Chartres) must be our standard. If you are going to be a builder, no other standard is worthwhile.”

Building Habits

Campers, what is your Chartres? You most likely don’t know yet.

That’s ok – took me a long time, too. BUT… this is important so lean in… focusing on whatever I was really interested in at the time helped me build habits that led to making Weequahic my ‘Chartres.’

Didn’t matter if it was my school work (ok – once I figured out I wouldn’t be a doctor), my golf or my extra-curricular groups like the IMPS at UVA.

Once I got seriously into that which I chose to do, I started building important habits that created more drive, attention to detail, big picture thinking, servant leadership, business understanding and more.

None of those things were, ultimately, my ‘Chartres.’ However, all that practice prepared me to lead and run Weequahic. (All of that also led me to the biggest prize in my life, Kate, and our three young men.)

What Is Your Chartres… Right Now?

Whatever you are working on, do your best. Make it a masterpiece to the best of your ability. Work a little extra on it, ask for help, compare it to something you’ve done before.

Please don’t misunderstand – whatever it is you are doing does not need to be perfect. I know Picasso and Renoir and Jobs and Freda would all want to make changes for a long time on their works. None of them are “perfect.”


Perfect is not the point. The point is what you learn along the way while working towards that vision in your head. It’s about exploring new boundaries within yourself and the world around you. I’ll leave you with this quote from Y Combinator founder, Paul Graham:

“With ambition, you tend to get one step below what you aim for. So, unless you try to be the best, you won’t even be good.” Go do your best. Every time. All the learning will be worth it.

Have a great week!

Courage and Freedom

March 23rd, 2024

One of the ladies I enjoy learning from gave a big speech the other day. The whole thing is worthwhile but I wanted to focus on a story she relayed near the end: 

…when, on a trip to Israel, I met my hero and now my friend, Natan Sharansky, I really only had one question for him. I asked him if it was possible to teach courage. 

He paused and said this: “No. You can’t teach it. You can only show people how good it feels to be free.”

Bari Weiss, 92nd Street Y Address

By now, if you’ve been a part of Weequahic or read anything we’ve written, you’ve come across our feeling about ‘courage.’ I’ve written about it a few times. 

As a person who beats the drum about ‘courage,’ I was stopped by Mr. Sharansky’s reply. And, I think he may be right. 

Definition

So, before we start, how do we define courage? The Oxford Dictionary defines courage as the ability to do something that frightens one.  So, in other words, you’ve got to be afraid in order to be courageous. 

It doesn’t matter if you are feeling fear from looking down from the zipline station or getting on the bus for the first time, getting up on stage to address the whole camp or connect with your new bunkmate soon-to-be friends. Feeling no fear? No courage is needed. 

And, without courage, there is no freedom – from fear or anything else. Campers, this is important:

Just because you ‘feel’ fear doesn’t mean you are ‘captured’ by it. You still have the freedom to act as you’d like. It’s simply up to you.

Viewing Courage

When I think of teaching, I mostly think of book-learning and Mrs. Vipperman introducing biology to me as a seventh grader, chalk in hand and frog in front of me. (She was a heck of a teacher – and very memorable.) And, I’ve learned (a bit) about courage and the freedom it creates from books.

I’ve read a lot about people who have shown courage. Whether it be about Dr. King or George Washington or Mahatma Ghandi or Mother Teresa or Harry Potter or John Snow, I’ve got stories and stories and stories in my head of people who lived ‘free.’ 

From these stories, we can be introduced to courage and living free. It’s better, though, to be surrounded by people from whose example you can learn in real time. 

‘Doing’ Courage

The second best way to learn how to live free is to watch those around you. At camp, counselors come to mind first. They’ve chosen to become part of something larger than themselves and pour everything they have into making the summer amazing. It takes courage on their part to do so. Why? Because it would be so much easier staying home and working at the GAP or the coffee shop or doing an internship in some big office. But… those things are rarely as meaningful, purpose-full or fun.

The next group I think about as ‘examples’ are our CITs. Watching them balance their responsibilities of leading camp with the fantastic benefits of being a CIT (fridge in your bunk, more flexible time, their own Cove space, etc.) is very instructive. 

The very best way, though, to learn anything (just about) is to do it. Badly, at first, most likely. When you learned to walk, it was a stumbling, bumbling, hair raising experience for both you and your parents (for different reasons.) But you learned. 

Courage is the same way. Start off by standing up against something small that frightens you. For example….

I remember young Luke being afraid of snakes at first. With the help of a fantastic naturalist and surrounded by his parents, Luke (barely) touched a small black snake.  A little later that day, he held it with the naturalist’s hands underneath his own. After learning more and taking instruction seriously, a few days later Luke handled the snake on his own. Ultimately, he wound up showing other kids the snakes and helping them through their own fear.

Requirements

What does it take to build courage? A couple of things: 

1.     Opportunity – you can’t start practicing if you don’t have the opportunity. Camp, as you may have already guessed, is a great opportunity. So is the classroom! 

2.     Encouragement – Get around people who you KNOW want the best for you and let their support put wind in your sails. Your parents, coaches, teachers, siblings (yes, I said it) and close friends. And DEFINITELY your camp people.

3.     Curiosity – You’ll never know what is on the other side of that fear you are feeling until you experience it. If your curiosity edges out your fear, you’ll be ready to show the courage to try. 

4.     Safety Net – Hey, Miguel would never let you on the trapeze without the net, your safety harness and several good pairs of hands to support you. Kiera and Osmar wouldn’t let you climb without your harness, a properly tied rope, helmet and spotter. Make sure you’ve got your safety net around you… and then jump!

Courage will open up the world to you. You’ll be able to enjoy more thoughtful relationships, experience deeper satisfaction and extend past your self-perceived limits. There will certainly be bumps in the road and…, well, so much more joy, too. 

Go on, camper. Take the first step to get past that fear and feel the joy of being free. We’ll be here to help.